Not Sure What I Was Smoking

Oh my God. Lmao! I’m sifting through my memories on Facebook. I came across a post I made two years ago, during yet another inspired manic run. I don’t know if I wrote this, but I do remember thinking about it. surely sounds like me during that time.

I’m not sure what I was smoking.

“Before the beginning, there was nothing.

At first it was just me and Jesus and The Holy Spirit hanging out and having fun in perfect happiness.

There was no time. There was no space. Just us – and that is all. We just sat there in the abyss and talked, and had thumb wars, and had staring contests, and that’s all we needed.

Like I said, there was no time and clocks yet, so I cannot say how long we had been sitting in the nothingness just talking. But I can tell you that at some point our conversations began to go stale.

There are only so many times you can talk about the time the Holy Spirit farted and still be amused. So it wasn’t long before the three of us grew quite bored.

We stared in silence at each other for what must have been billions of years.

Eventually I broke the silence. I told Jesus and the Holy Spirit that I had thought up a way for us to entertain ourselves for the rest of time. We would create a whole world full of little people for us to play with.

Honestly, that’s how it all started. Of course it all became so much more.”

Oddly enough, I met someone with a similar story. I was lying in bed with a man who claimed to be Satan. I believed it because he lived in a dungeon n had spider crickets running up his legs. Only Satan would come up such a combo. 😉

Everything was so surreal to me, that I began to cry in his arms n I asked if I had died. He said yes n told me how I came into existence n how I perished. It was really a beautiful story, actually. He left out the fart jokes though.

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